MARIO.jpg (663 bytes)The Evil Mario Page



A long long time ago...

In a far away galaxy...

Super Mario was swayed by the dark side. Princess Toadstool promised him oral and anal pleasure to do her bidding. So he became the scourge of the Nintendo TM  Universe. His antics are Chronicled here, for all the world to see. As are his henchmen's!

The cause of Mario's downfall, the one, the only...


TOADS.jpg (810 bytes) Princess Toadstool! Having become sick and tired of Bowsers repeated kidnappings, the Princess snapped and became an evil sex crazed temptress! She went after bowser with an army of Toads, and destroyed him and his castle! She then assumed full command of his legions of Koopa Troopas and Goombas! The power convulted her! She soon summoned Mario to her chambers, where after many blow jobs, she convinced him to join her evil empire! Her talents include being able to spread her legs at near the speed of sound, and take a 12 inch piece of man meat all the way to the hilt!

MARIO.jpg (663 bytes) Super Mario! At one time he was the greatest video game hero ever to grace a console system. But Mario's long repressed dark side was awakened by 6 consecutive orgasms! Sexual Repression is a dangerous thing! Mario has since become the most evil son of a bitch in the world! he carries a remington double barreled shotgun, and can jump almost 50 feet straight up! His sheer ruthlessness is enough to overpower many opponents! Definitely a force to be reckoned with!


An evil bastard wouldn't be an evil bastard without proper henchfolk to do his dirty sinful work!


Mario's henchmen!

DUG.jpg (582 bytes)   Dug! This evil son of a bitch starred in, not one, but two unsuccessful NES games. He greatly resents his failure, and was quick to flock to Mario's side! His mastery of evil skills include the ability to Sink into the ground, fire a harpoon from his gut, and talk about people behind their backs!

SIMON.jpg (840 bytes)Simon Belmont! This evil fellow once was the hero of millions! People rejoiced as he slayed Dracula and his minions countless times. But times, they are a changin'. Poor Simon blew all his money on cheap booze and pornography! So, you can imagine he'd be eager to become Mario's right hand man! His frightful talents include a fantastic degree of agility, fearlessness, and outright ruthlessness! He also wields a mean whip!


It is said there can be no evil without good... or..maybe its the other way around.. either way..a small group of people have taken a stand against Mario's tyranny!


The Good Guys!


LINK.jpg (639 bytes)Link! Link can't stand by while evils afoot! He's the hero he's always been! Complete with sword and shield, our hero will fight Mario's evil to the ends of the earth and beyond! Link's deadly with his sword, and a master of several ancient martial arts, including the ominous "flaming dung".

LUIGI.jpg (703 bytes)Luigi!  Mario's younger and nicer brother! This poor guy has been mysteriously absent from videogames for years, but now he's back, and with a vengeance! He deeply resents his older brother, Mario. He works as a double agent, so Link and crew are always one step ahead! Luigi has the uncanny ability to "high run" which enables him to burrow through solid rock and travel at speeds exceeding 12 MPH!

MEGA.jpg (863 bytes)MegaMan! Megaman is one of our heroes greatest allies! If only he didn't frequent the drink. Yes, there's rarely a time you'll find Mega Man sober, and without a mysterious cloud hovering just above his head. He has a blaster, but he probably forgot how to use it. He mostly shows up after a battle, and goes: "Eh.."


OLDFARTS.jpg (1034 bytes)The Old Wise Couple! They've joined the resistance in order to guide and encourage Link in his efforts! When they aren't speaking wise words, or mixing potions, they entertain themselves with intense anal sex.


The Movies!

Mario's Christmas Special!  Egad! Mario has hijacked a film studio for his own evil purposes! Even Mario has the Christmas Spirit! In this heartwarming special, he beats our heroes (save megaman who was off having an intimate encounter with a bottle of Kentucky Red eye) to within an inch of their lives! Thank god for band-aids!

The Gathering Mario gives a powerful speech to his army of evil bastards. And he administers the only true brand of justice to a unfortunately stupid soldier: shotgun justice.

Dug strikes!  Dug's appearance spells doom for Link's father! Link vows vengeance!

Mario gets some tail   Mario, very pleased with his evilness, confronts the princess. And gives her 9 inches of mushroom enhanced manliness!

Simon stakes his claim Luigi tries to inform Link of Mario's new plan, but is stopped by the arrival of the evil Simon Belmont!

Mario lets loose the beast We get to see Mario's REAL boss.

Dug scores Dugs been fooling with Marios experimental cloning device...

Mario Likes Soda Mario's a thirsty mother fucker

LICHENS Mario's deadly new weapon..LICHENS..

The night we never metDug's a bit depressed, so he stops at a local dive and encounters megaman!

Cold blooded murder. Just as the title suggests




Want to submit your own "Evil Mario" Animated movie? Consult the Submission Information page


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Legal Crap

All characters locations and the like are registered trade marks of Nintendo. We are in no way affiliated with the big N. (please don't sue us! its all just a big joke, we're poor anyway, all you'd get would be like, 50 cents and a piece of lint!) The Movies, or "Antics" as they're called were created by the tireless efforts of Gen Fluke And Lop, lord of the penguins. Catering by Cerebus Bus, the first choice for shitty food!